Road to Ruin or how to become a Writer (successful writer?) and not die trying. (2).

Road to Ruin or how to become a Writer (successful writer?) and not die trying. (2).

So, now that you have listened to the voice of reason and decided to self-publish your work, you find yourself wondering what to do next.

Well, first of all, your book needs to be prepared for the platform on which you are going to publish it. In this case Kindle Direct Publishing or KDP for the dudes in the know, if you know what I mean!.  At the same time, I suppose you, like every writer under the blue sky,  would love to see your book printed in real ink and paper. So now we are looking at another awesome service from Amazon, CreateSpace.

Here is a helpful video to everything you must know in order to use this service.

If you believe this lovely video, you just have to publish it, sit back and relax. Maybe you will have to make the odd call to your accountant once a week to find out how many millions you have made this week for your book sales. Good old Amazon will look after you. What a lot of tosh!!!.

If you follow what the video says you will be lucky to sell one copy of your book to your aunt Petunia, and only because you are his/her favourite nephew/niece.  Another thing is that this Oscar-winning video needs updating because KDP and CreateSpace are to become one service as we speak, or write… Whatever.

I suppose this will make everybody happy because now you only have to upload your book to one service instead of two.

Format your book.

Make sure you format your book the right way if you want to be able to read it on a Kindle or similar device, otherwise your text will look more like a crossword puzzle.  And while I am on this subject, I have just installed the free version of Grammarly and it is a godsend, especially if English is not your first language, like me. Yes, I know it is shocking news, but I write under a pseudonym or ¨nom de plume¨, like the posh writers out there call it.

Anyway, after revealing this dreadful truth, I invite you to watch this video about how to format your book yourself and save a few bucks in the process. Enjoy.

I hope that was useful. It was for me. After I finished writing my first book I had to go through the whole thing formatting every chapter. It was a bit of a pain in the ass. Now I format as I go, making my life a lot easier. The thing with self-publishing is that you have to, or at least I had to, learn a ton of new skills that previously, in that wonderful world full of butterflies and rainbows, was performed by the publishing house, but now, you are the publishing house. Congratulations!!!

Design your book cover.

After you have checked your manuscript for typos and formatted so it won´t annoy  KDP upload page your creation is almost ready to be published.  But before that, you will need a crucial element in your success or failure as a writer. You´ll have to, either design a cover for your book or most likely find somebody to do it for you. In my case, if I had designed my own cover for my book, a young adult adventure extravaganza, I would have to settle hundreds of lawsuits for the mental damage caused to my readers when they looked at it. So the clever option is to find a young artist that is starting on their way to stardom, just like you, that can do a decent job for a reasonable fee. For my own book, I tried first to get Kevin Keele but he was busy with I don´t know what project for Disney or Pixar, excuses, excuses… Only joking. His work is pretty amazing. You can check it out here:

If you find some amazing illustrator, that´s great, otherwise you can always find somebody to do it on this website, Fiverr. Lost of people offer their services, of a decent nature, on this webpage. You can find people to do proofreading, formatting, web design, book covers, you name it. Most of the ¨gigs¨, like the Fiverr connaisseurs call them, start at the very reasonable price of 5 dollars, hence the name Fiverr, Genius!. I haven´t tried their services as I am officially at the stage of finding some poor soul to do my book cover. See, all this time you were thinking I was a multimillion bestseller author but truth be told I am just like you. A penniless unknown writer. But do not fear. We shall change that very soon my friend.

Do not forget that if you are thinking of publishing your book to physically be touched and loved, in a pure way, of course, you will need to ask your awesome illustrator chum to design the back and spine as well, otherwise, KDP will say no way Jose to you.

This is the link to Fiverr, it might be useful:

If I make any progress on the book design cover I shall be updating this post, so make sure you come back and check my blog from time to time to get the latest news on the pursuit of greatness, or you shall suffer the wrath of the seven hells. Where did that come from?. Excuse me. I think it is a bit from my latest book.

To sum up, my lovely wannabe writers check out Kindle Direct Publishing, because you have a friend in them, just like Buddy used to sing. Get your book into shape and get a fancy cover for it, because, in the world of self- publishing, you do judge a book by its cover.

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